Thursday, December 17, 2015

Dear Baby...

 This is our first family photo.
It makes me smile!
Your brother kept us entertained that day.
He ended our photo session by running and jumping in the pond!
We used this picture on our Christmas cards.
You wished everyone a Merry Christmas, too!
That's right!  Your name was on the card!
You finally have a name!!!
And, you have no idea how happy that has made my heart!
Gradin Thomas Williams
(pronounced Gray-den)
We officially named you on Thanksgiving Eve.
I cried happy tears!
Since then, we've said your name a million times and each time I fall more in love!
You have your daddy's initials and share his middle name.
He wanted it that way and I think it makes your name even more special!
In a few days you'll be 26 weeks old.
Which means we only have about 13 more weeks or so until we meet face to face!
I can't wait to hold you and kiss you and squeeze you tight! 
You are really growing fast these days.  Almost two pounds you are! 
You aren't the only one gaining ounces by the day!
I haven't been able to wear my wedding rings for a few weeks now.
It just didn't feel right.  My hand constantly felt naked.
And, to be honest, I was worried about looking like an unwed pregnant lady.
So, I started to wear the ring your daddy gave me for my birthday last year.
It was always a smidge too big so I didn't wear it often.
Now, it fits like a charm! 
It's a gemstone ring, a pale bluish green color. 
So pale that in certain lighting it actually looks like a diamond.
It makes my hand feel dressed and I no longer worry about what strangers think!
I know...your momma is so silly!
The other night I was browsing through the jewelry store.
I was admiring all the beautiful sparkly gems when a thought dawned on me.
I wanted to know what your March birthstone would be.
Aquamarine is your stone.  A bluish green color.
I looked back through the glass counter.
Then at my hand.
It was just one of those "God wink" moments.
The ring was already special to me.  But now, it's even more so.

I've been thinking about God a lot lately.
How good He is.  How He always knows best.
How He already knows you...

Jeremiah 1:5
"I knew you before I formed you in your mother's womb."

He already knows what you will look like.
He knows what your voice will sound like.
He knows what you will grow up to be.
Who you will marry.
How many children you will have.
You were God's son way before you were ours.
How amazing.
How humbling.
How beautiful.

I love Christmas time.  It's magical.  It's special.
Every morning after I wake up, you and I share a Hersey's Kiss.
Just one!  After all, it is the holiday season and it starts our day off sweet!
I turn our Christmas tree lights on and soak in all the beauty.
And then I say the same prayer I've said for the past six months.

Thank you, God.
Thank you for trusting me to be Gradin's momma.
Thank you for giving us this opportunity.
Thank you for answered prayers.

I feel overcome by Christmas this year.
My heart is just so thankful.
And so full of love.
And I think that must have been how Mary felt on the very first Christmas.

All my love,
Your Momma
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